I arch my back and feel my shoulders ache; I close my eyes and imagine a set of wings with silken black feathers sprout between my shoulder blades. I spread them wide and give them a shake and allow the air to rustle each feather until they're all light and fluffy.
I stand tall and proud, such a long time since I released them from their confines, at first they ache, the nerves set in and I wonder if they still work, what if I fall? Trust... I must trust.
I walk to the edge and look out far into the distance, I spread my wings again, slowly raising them up and down, feeling their strength as my blood forces its way through each side to their very tip; they fill with life. I start to move them gracefully up and down as I feel myself lift so gently from the earth, nerves set in and I allow myself to drop. My eyes erupt with tears and like hot lava they slowly flow down my cheeks, where am I going?
I walk to the edge again and look down at the ocean of outcomes wildly thrashing about below me, each with their pros and cons. Am I to old? Have I lost my nerve? Will they still work? So much fear, where does it stem from?
I close my eyes within my vision and allow my imagined soul to visualise leaning forward. Again I raise my wings and this time I allow myself to dive forward racing towards the ocean below, just as I am about to fall victim to my fears I stretch my wings out wide and allow the wind to lift me into the open air; raising me higher and higher. For now I am in bliss. The warmth of the fading sun setting in the distance bathes my face with a welcoming peace.
I glide out across the ocean and notice that the closer I get to my intended destination the ocean below seems to calm, my choices seem easier and the outcomes become but a ripple.
I snap back to reality, wipe my tears and take a deep cleansing breath. I know I will be ok, tomorrow a new day… a step closer to taking my leap for real. Maybe next I will swim in my ocean and become accustom to its depths…
Today I smile.
I walk to the edge again and look down at the ocean of outcomes wildly thrashing about below me, each with their pros and cons. Am I to old? Have I lost my nerve? Will they still work? So much fear, where does it stem from?
I close my eyes within my vision and allow my imagined soul to visualise leaning forward. Again I raise my wings and this time I allow myself to dive forward racing towards the ocean below, just as I am about to fall victim to my fears I stretch my wings out wide and allow the wind to lift me into the open air; raising me higher and higher. For now I am in bliss. The warmth of the fading sun setting in the distance bathes my face with a welcoming peace.
I glide out across the ocean and notice that the closer I get to my intended destination the ocean below seems to calm, my choices seem easier and the outcomes become but a ripple.
I snap back to reality, wipe my tears and take a deep cleansing breath. I know I will be ok, tomorrow a new day… a step closer to taking my leap for real. Maybe next I will swim in my ocean and become accustom to its depths…
Today I smile.
Dude.
ReplyDeleteThat is one beautiful piece.
Another post and I find myself cursing that I didn't write it. Up there flexing those wings with you.
ReplyDeletePower, evocative words and feelings Shane. You're very in touch with your feelings - it's a blessing and a curse.
ReplyDeleteYou have my unwavering support always.
Thanks Iz
ReplyDeleteMr D, when are you gonna start writing again? your words are so kind :)
Mel, I thank you a heap for your support, you dont know how much you give... even sometimes without knowing :)
Truly a beautiful portreyal of choices we make (or need to make) Shane..
ReplyDeleteThanks Rangers...
ReplyDelete